I have always believed memories are forever. I have never doubted that the memory of my 5th birthday party or that day I got my first puppy are inaccurate in any way. They are how I remember them, and how I remember them is true. That's all there is to it. Right?
Two days before I was to turn 5 years old, itchy, red spots began to swarm my body: chicken pox. Only one girl showed up to my party; everyone else's mothers didn't want them in the close vicinity of a sick, contagious child. There was a giant white cake with blue frosting. I wore a little yellow dress and my hair in a high pony-tail. We played "pin the tail on the donkey." It's all so clear. And despite my minor illness, it was a terrific day. I smile thinking back on it now.
But just last week, photos from that day were found stored away upstairs in the attic. To my surprise, the photos revealed a giant BLUE cake! I was dressed in a little orange t-shirt and shorts. The party was a puppet show, not "pin the tail on the donkey." Yes, I did have the chicken pox and only one friend was at my party, but the rest of my so called "memories" were completely off. I was shocked.
Our class discussion last week hit my issue right on the nose. The teachers spoke of a podcast called Radiolab in which the hosts explore different Science related topics, one of which being memory. What the Radiolab anchors have discovered is that every time you recall a memory, you are actually recreating that memory. When it is being recreated, it is being reassembled, reevaluated and therefore subconsciously being changed. That means that the things you remember the most often are actually the memories that are the most subject to alteration. Those are the memories that are the further from the truth. And those are the memories we cherish and share as if they are truthful and accurate.
This was a little much to handle at first. If my 5th birthday party, a more or less insignificant date in my childhood, had been altered, then there was no doubt that plenty of other, more significant memories had been changed as well. These memories have shaped me as I've grown up, and it's scary and difficult to picture these memorable moments of my life differently. So I guess my question is... if all the memories you've ever remembered may be inaccurate, does that make them any less real? Does knowing these memories are altered change their everlasting impact?
You can listen here to the podcast about memory and forgetting.
I've got to say that I'm not too worried about past memories that don't have impact on decisions I am making today, but more the random other things my brain does on a daily basis that are totally and completely messed up. One specifically relating to memory is the Illusion-of-truth effect, where statements you've heard before seem more true than others - even if the first time someone told you this is false, and then told you something, the next time you heard it you would be more likely to believe it. Which sort of discounts any faith I have in my ability to make accurate, logical decisions.
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